Keeping Me Sane
by pawpad
Summary: Hutch has a few thoughts while watching his partner sleep.


Disclaimer: - I don't and never shall own either Starsky or Hutch. It is a shame, a big shame, but that is the truth.  
  
Keeping Me Sane  
  
Hutch's POV  
  
I sit staring out the window, the same way I have been doing these past few days, wondering if it'll ever end. I pull my gaze away and stare over at my sleeping partner. I notice a few curls are flattered against his sweaty forehead and I consider wiping them away, but I don't want to wake him. He needs to sleep. I allow myself to smile; Starsky looks so peaceful when he sleeps.  
  
I turn back to stare out the window again and let out a sigh.  
  
Peaceful.  
  
Now there's a word you don't get to use a lot when you're a cop. The life of any policeman is anything but peaceful, with all the crime you see day in and day out. It's enough to drive you insane.  
  
Take me and Starsky, we've been partners for a long time now and the amount of times our lives have been in danger or placed on the line because we're cops is enough to make any rational person ask why we continue to wear the badge.  
  
I'll agree our lives are dangerous, I mean just take my track record. I once got this guy arrested, breaking up his business and as punishment he hires some guy to run me off the road down a cliff. I could have been killed. I'll agree that that was a tough moment, but I got through it, with the help of my partner.  
  
Although I will admit that most of the heartaches and troubles I've had don't usually have much to do with the fact I'm a cop. When Forest kidnapped me and pumped me full of Heroin. He would have done that whether I was a cop or not. It was all to do with the woman I was dating. The same thing with Gillian, if I hadn't been a cop she may have been killed anyway. That's something that' always plagued my mind, would she still be alive if I wasn't cop? I try not to think about it too much. If I did I truly believe I'd be in the funny farm right now.  
  
My partner on the other hand, now his bad luck usually comes around because he is a cop. For example when he were in that restaurant and those two gangsters were doing to assassinate Vic Monte. The only reason my partner got shot is because we were recognised as cops. If we were two normal guys, who knows how things would have been. Another example, when Starsky was poisoned, that was part of a revenge plot. We arrested this kid, who was high and shot himself with my gun and the father wants revenge. There are a hundred more things I could come up with if I tried, Terri's death, Gunther's assassination attempt and God knows what else.  
  
Yes I'd agree some people may wonder how on earth we get through the days, how we mange to push past all the horrors we witness and all the heartaches we suffer. There are times when I believe that it all comes down to one thing and that's the love my partner and I have for each other. We're always there when the other one needs help and we'd both drive to Hell, set up residence there, meet the locals and come back if it meant the other one survived. I will admit that openly to anyone and although that bond of friendship and love is a big part of what keeps us both sane I wouldn't say it was the only thing.  
  
If I had to say what it is, that little thing that occurs nearly everyday that without it we'd both be locked away in the loony bin, I'd say it was our childish banter. The mild arguments and the teasing we do everyday whether it's Starsky mocking and bitching about my car or me telling him to eat less junk food. There was even this time I kept bring up the fact that being left handed was wrong, which I can tell annoyed him more than he wanted to show.  
  
But no matter what it is we're teasing each other about it helps to keep our minds of the job we do and help us to forget some of the hideous and inhuman things we're seen. It's helped to keep our sanity and trust me when I say that's worth a few remarks aimed at my car.  
  
I turned my gaze back to my sleeping partner and notice he hasn't moved an inch since last I checked on him, except there are a few more beads of sweat running down the side of his face.  
  
I reach my hand over and place it gently on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. It's enough to wake him up, much to my surprise. He opens one eye first and looks groggily up at me.  
  
"Hutch" He slurred his voice not yet joining his body in the waking world. I give him a smile and a nod.  
  
"It's me buddy"  
  
I watch his attempt to sit up a little to get comfortable, but under the circumstance I can see it's a futile attempt. I see him wince a little, more than likely from a pain in his neck. Well I can't blame him for feeling that.  
  
"Anything happen while I was out" He asked. I shake my head  
  
"Nothing worth reporting" Starsky ran a hand over his sweaty face and managed to sit up a little further.  
  
"Next time we agree to take a stakeout we're taking my car. It's easier to get comfortable in it" I sigh deeply. I could see this coming the moment we got here.  
  
"Sorry to break this to you, but your car sticks out like a sore thumb. In fact your car is a sore thumb on wheels" Starsky grunts, the exact reply I expected.  
  
"You're just jealous because your car is such a boring colour" I turn my head away from him to look back out the window.  
  
"And that's the way I like it" I wait a few minutes for the come back, but it never comes. I let myself smile cause I know I've won and so does he.  
  
"Yeah well get some sleep, that's if you can in this car"  
  
I lean my head against the headrest and close my eyes. That's right Starsky you keep that up. You keep me sane buddy. 


End file.
